Growing up in Patna, capital of Bihar in India, has been one the greatest experiences for me. I lived in a big family home with lots of people around me. Grandmothers, aunties, uncles, cousins everybody lived close by. There were a lot of helping hands in the household from cooks, cleaners, gardeners, priests who all became family because they were always there in their own little houses in the campus. Absolutely loved it all. Each one of them is very dear to me. Some are still there and some have passed away but they will always be with me and in my heart, even when I am so far away in UK.
The thing is everybody knew every ones business. I remember my father consulting our pundit ji (priest, ji for respect)for important matters of the household from farming to marriage arrangements. He became a brother in times of need. The cook and cleaners were the pillars of the house, always there with a glass of water when anybody would come from the heat. They never let you feel lonely, would always ask about the day and your work.
I have cried and laughed with them. They could do counselling when needed. Uncles aunties would interfere in anything and everything. I am glad they did. Different perspectives of a matter came out and helped in decision making. Failures and success made not much of a difference because if one had success there might be someone else with some degree of failure and everyone had to be helped. It did not make much of a difference whether you were doing the best or a mediocre or even failed in an exam. Somebody was always there to tell you a tale of a similar type and how in the end everything became fine.
In England, we don’t discuss other peoples affairs, at least not with the person who is involved. People do talk behind others for sure. I do like to interfere and get the whole story out from people, straight from the horses mouth as they say. Once you have talked it over, everything feels sorted to some degree. We don’t like to interfere in our kids affairs be it friends, studies or careers but sometimes we should. It will help them. No need to judge. Give a piece of your minds, and why not. The can pay heed to it or not. It might help them for all you know. Do try and interfere in other lives, even your neighbours. It is human to help each other and be there for one another. I do wish society could be a bit more open. We would certainly be a happier community and place to live in.