My happiness relies on self trust. Do I trust you? Should I trust you? Above it all I think I first need to trust myself. I have expectations and dreams that I want to live upto. I know they are difficult but if I have thought them for myself and I must try to fulfill them. Along the way I have many responsibilities which have to be fulfilled. I don’t want to hurt anybody or harm anybody along the journey.
I make small promises to myself nearly every day, every month, every first January. Kept up with some but quite a few that have been forgotten. So they were not important perhaps.
I asked my son – what is it that I should trust you for? We have profound coversations every morning on way to school and then my self- conversations to work. We came up with a few things. I could see his thought process was towards studies and results . My thought process for a moment was -putting everyday your boxers in the washing basket could be a good start son.
I find it hard to trust myself all the time. So I feel I cannot put pressure to be trustworthy on others.Trust is a big thing to live up to. I hate to break it even if its the smallest of things. Difference of opinion is another matter. To put pressure on my children with trust is not very fair. I know its a difficult life these days for teenagers and there is no need to put extra undue pressures with enforcing my trust. Proper language and respect could be a good start to trust my children with I feel.
Trust is important. We all need somebody that we can totally trust. I need to trust myself fully before I expect it from anybody else.I don’t want to be too harsh on myself either. I know I will be happy if I can trust myself.