Dead Now

What if I were to die tomorrow ? So I will be gone.There will be none of me left . Shit man. Shit. But hey it happens. 50 people dead in a shooting , knife crimes, wars, accidents be it car, plane, cruise ship and of course a sudden heart attack or a massive stroke – endless ways of dying suddenly. We have all experienced death. A close friend, family, an acquaintance has died and the most horrible and painful one is a sudden death.

The thought that one day it will be or could be me is a hard one. But its the truth. Why is it hard though. I cried just now. Why. Why cant I let go of life.

I dont know the answers. If you have them , let me know. I think I live my life well enough and do what I want to do. I don’t have much regrets. I still totally don’t want to die. Only old people are ready to die and die happily. What is it that elderly have achieved that I haven’t. Its not they are fed up of life,no of course not. If they are in their nineties-people have lived their lives. So had kids, seen grand kids, some great holidays- not sure if these are the only reasons for living.

I think we fear the pain that we will leave behind. People do suffer, a loving father dies and you will be left behind to cry everyday of your life. We don’t want that. No mother, father,brother, sister had wished that for you. So we shouldn’t.

How do you live a life fully? I have cracked my head enough.You all give me some answers.I just want to be happy so I can say when I am dying that I have lived my life.

9 thoughts on “Dead Now

  1. Thought provoking. Hugs to you first Rishi why this thought came to your mind. Living in present only is the answer to all the fears which are our biggest enemies. Think not of past as that is decayed or a corpse . Think not of future as it’s not in our hands. So we have only present so live every moment to its fullest and enjoy its bliss… This is my view and and hope I am not judgemental.. Love you dear.

  2. A profound writeup Rishi… What happened in New Zealand was horrific & heartbreaking… Such hate must not exist in this world… But it also reminds us once again as to how unpredictable & short life is… I guess, one should enjoy the small joys of life & take each day as it comes… What’s a full life? Not sure… Maybe to each his own… One can never really get everything & one will not be able to do all… So, to be satisfied with what one has & make the best of what one can is maybe the way to go on in our life’s journey…

  3. I think Mark Twain summarises it well. But we are so busy ‘living life to the fullest’ that we actually forget to ‘live life’, and hence we fear death. Living life in my opinion is as suggested by others, being in the moment (not living for the moment), enjoy nature and all the simple things in life. It’s when we add too much value to all the things we do like going on holidays or partying or going for events that giving it all up makes us fear death. But if we just are who we are, stay in the present all of the time, not reminisce and cling to things, people, memories, then we are living a full life.
    My two pence, loving the simplicity and profundity of your blogs.