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I am contemplating my reasons to work. Love to write. Love to walk. Love my job as a doctor. Love my crafts. I get held back with writing these days due to my job. As you know working in NHS these days is difficult for a number of reason and can become frustrating due to time and resource constraints. How long can I or should I go on working if I am not happy with the whole situation? I think there is a time when I will have to take a decision how I want my life to go. A big reason to work is because I have to pay my bills. Yes it does pay the bills. But I think bills for me was never the reason to be doing what I am doing.
I do want to look after myself too. Hearing stories of patient day in, day out and giving then advice to look after themselves, I need to put that into practice as well. Frustration in itself can be a big reason to become ill. I have a lot of option, change career completely, become part time or change the job or actually resign and do shifts which and when I please. I dont think I am alone in thinking along these lines. Need to find the motivation to get back on track. By the way if you see me crying it is not because I am depressed, it is because dilemma throws me completely out of my depth and I feel helpless with my situation. I am an emotional being and have been so since I was a kid.
I will keep working on my frustration, hoping for it to become better soon.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-51032691